Preface
This will act as a log of sorts of my self-imposed experiment. I will update his log every day for as long as I can. This log will auto-upload to the web if I make no changes for three straight days or after 25 days, whichever comes first.
Raison D'être
Sleeping and dreaming remain some of the enigmatic mysteries of the human body. No one quite understands their real purpose. There have been experiments conducted over the last century and the half or so on the effects of sleep deprivation of course. The most well documented one involved a high school student staying awake for over 11 days. He was closely recorded by a renowned sleep expert the whole time. So, while others claim to have gone without sleep for longer, their true credibility is hard to verify, because even a minute of sleep can reset the whole experiment. The student reported disturbing hallucinations, delusions, and erratic behavior. After the ordeal, he went to sleep for fourteen hours, woke up refreshed, and reported no long-term side effects.
Most studies say that the student lost motor function as he went longer and longer without sleep. That he was “dreaming while awake,” referring to his hallucinations. In fact, brain activity monitoring showed that the student exhibited brain activity when awake that was normally associated with REM sleep – the state of our brain related to dreaming. However, I have reason to believe that we do not lose motor function because due to lack of sleep.
We gain it.
When the human mind enters REM, I hypothesize that it falls into a pattern that attempts to reveal the true nature of our surroundings, to lift the veil that normally obscures our senses. However, lifting this curtain likely does more harm than good since I hypothesize that sleep is an evolutionary trait developed to ensure that when we enter REM state – the state in which we would normally be able see truly, what lies around us, we are asleep, and thus spared what would presumably be debilitating effects. The dreams we experience are the side effects of this reality.
We are so far removed from this reality however, that I speculate it will take multiple days of consistent wakefulness for the effects of REM to come into full swing.
I do this in hopes of heralding a new era for mankind.
Day 1
Normal day, nothing out of the ordinary whatsoever occurred Ate, read books, played some games. Nothing to note.
Day 2
I have a doctorate degree. I’ve spent plenty of nights staying up finishing an assignment I had procrastinated. Nothing new, this day is also perfectly normal, though I noted a small decrease an appetite.
Day 3
A bit of fatigue starting to creep in. Lower appetite. Minor hallucinations. I often imagine something is moving at the edge of my vision, an insect or the like, but when I look to it, there is nothing there.
Day 4
Fatigue is definitely heavier now, though nothing I cannot handle. Insect hallucinations persist, and it seems as if the “insects” are larger. Still nothing when I look at them however. I had some friends, Jonah and Merin, drive me to a restaurant. We chatted and ate, and I felt normal, not sleep deprived at all. When they left however, the feeling came rushing back. Since I won’t be using drugs of any sort, including caffeine, to keep me awake, I’ll be relying increasingly on Jonah and Merin to make sure I follow through with the experiment without any sleep.
Day 5
This is now the longest I’ve ever stayed awake. The one time before was on a bet with a friend, however, I’m sure I must’ve taken micro-naps and such when I did. Heavier fatigue, and the insects are definitely larger now. I have no real idea of what they look like, they are just black at the edges of my vision. I’m vaguely aware of size and movement, but when I whip my head around there is nothing there. I called Merin and talked to her for a few hours multiple times to keep myself entertained and thus, awake.
Day 6
I have a bit of a headache, but other than that fatigue actually seems to have lessened a bit, strangely enough. The hallucinations were almost not there, almost. Jonah and Merin both commented that I seemed pretty much normal when previously I’d been a bit irate. Seems almost worrying. No matter, a day is a small sample size. Minor hormonal imbalances or just random moods may have caused me to feel more awake than normal.
Day 7
Again, I feel perfectly fine. I’m almost certain I have not been taking micro-naps, my custom-made bracelet would tell me if I were based on my pulse and breathing. I am beginning to seriously question my hypothesis now. I’d hoped for the “hallucinations,” to intensify, for my REM awake mind to perceive more deeply through the veil.
Day 8
The exhaustion has hit me much harder than day five. The hallucinations no longer haunt just my peripheral vision. I see insects, dark and somehow…blurry, crawling by my feet. Occasionally one will touch me, or at least I feel like one touches me. They are more detailed now. Not just generic insects but various kinds. Cockroaches, worms, spiders. I can only speculate now that Days 6 and 7 were the body’s last “reserves” so to say, driving off the sleep. These reserves, blessedly, seem to have expired; I can continue the experiment.
Day 9
Merin and Jonah have temporarily moved in to keep me awake. They switch off staying with me, making sure I don’t dose off. The hallucinations are growing more potent. Yesterday the TV suddenly faded to black, but something seemed…off. I frowned and moved closer to the TV with Jonah looking at me as if I was insane. When I was just inches away, I realized there wasn’t nothing there but everything. Millions of those insects were on the TV, crawling, trampling and eating one another. I screamed and tripped over the table trying to flinch away from the thing. Jonah swore that the TV had been playing normally the whole time.
Day 10
They are real. One of the insects bit my toe today. There was a sharp sensation of pain, like being poked by a needle, but it left a scar. I showed Jonah and Merin and they both could see it. They didn’t believe it was the insects of course, but I knew. I knew. I was right. I am right. These aren’t just hallucinations, these are real.
Day 11
I can hear them now. It is mostly just chitter chatter, though I can make out a select few words. “Come.” “Gate.” “Cross.” “Shroud.” That’s what they call it, their world. The Shroud. It is where they live, it is the other reality that is there, always there. It is the barrier which I have lowered for myself. Their meaning is clear. It is not enough yet, there is more to see, to experience. I must continue.
Day 12
Merin tried to talk me out of continuing the experiment today. She said I might suffer permanent damage. The insects, they whispered to me angrily as she did. I think I understand them more already. I was so close they said, so close. I flat out told Merin no. I wouldn’t back out after coming this far.
Day 13
The insects are everywhere. They cling lazily to the walls, the floor, to Merin and Jonah. And to me of course. I attract them like a magnet attracts metal shavings. Soon they promise. I can hardly contain myself.
Day 16
I’d almost forgot to update this log in time. Though to be honest I don’t really understand why I still do this. This doesn’t matter, if you’re reading you probably don’t matter. But there is a chance you read this, and you decide to do the same, to open your eyes. Perhaps that is reason enough. Perhaps. I can feel the veil weakening. I see more clearly already. They aren’t insects see, not really. But concepts, ideas. Black slimy worms emanate out of Merin and Jonah when they look at me. Worry. Sometimes there are black butterflies too – fear. I had Merin drive me around so I could just watch people. Blood-red bees around a fighting couple. Anger. Leeches next to a weeping couple standing near a small gravestone. Sorrow. Do they cause it or are they attracted to it? Irrelevant perhaps.
Day 18
Jonah and Merin have offered me an ultimatum. Day 20. Either I quit willingly, or they will stop trying to keep me awake. For my own good they say. Can’t they see this is good? I don’t think I can stay awake on my own despite it all. The human body seems to have evolved specifically to prevent such a thing from happening.
Day 19
It’s happened. It’s finally happened. One of the walls in my bedroom is no longer a wall. It is…a gateway. I suppose that’s the word for it. I can see it from my bedroom. I sat there, cross legged for hours just looking at it. The Shroud. It didn’t just have insects, it was insects. The trees were made of billions of them squirming, shifting against each other. Even the ground was a constantly moving orgy of insects. But what entranced me was It. The Creature. It stood as far away from it’s side of the portal as I was from my side. It was as tall as I was. It had two legs, four arms and a hexagonal face. It had no other features. And it was also constantly moving, shifting, writhing. It too was made of the insects. The portal beckoned. The Creature beckoned. But there was a price to pay of course. Such things are not free. I understood that now. I was a fool not have seen it before. I needed to attract the insects, more insects than I had ever even seen before. I needed to become of the Shroud.
Day 20
Lots of insects. They cover me. Anger. Worry. Sorrow. Fear. Worms, spiders, butterflies, leeches. They had covered the bodies before, the ones who would’ve taken it all from me. Who would’ve abandoned me at the precipice of greatness. They’d deserved it. But now the insects came to me, for it was my actions that had beckoned them. They were me and I was them, at least for a bit. I am going to step through, take down the final barrier separating our worlds. One small step for man…
Day 23
This is an automated message. Due to lack of activity for 72 hours, Var_Time_Out is set to true and this log has been automatically published
PrefaceThis will act as a log of sorts of my self-imposed experiment. I will update his log every day for as long as I can. This log will auto-upload to the web if I make no changes for three straight days or after 25 days, whichever comes first.Raison D'êtreSleeping and dreaming remain some of the enigmatic mysteries of the human body. No one quite understands their real purpose. There have been experiments conducted over the last century and the half or so on the effects of sleep deprivation of course. The most well documented one involved a high school student staying awake for over 11 days. He was closely recorded by a renowned sleep expert the whole time. So, while others claim to have gone without sleep for longer, their true credibility is hard to verify, because even a minute of sleep can reset the whole experiment. The student reported disturbing hallucinations, delusions, and erratic behavior. After the ordeal, he went to sleep for fourteen hours, woke up refreshed, and reported no long-term side effects.Most studies say that the student lost motor function as he went longer and longer without sleep. That he was “dreaming while awake,” referring to his hallucinations. In fact, brain activity monitoring showed that the student exhibited brain activity when awake that was normally associated with REM sleep – the state of our brain related to dreaming. However, I have reason to believe that we do not lose motor function because due to lack of sleep.We gain it.When the human mind enters REM, I hypothesize that it falls into a pattern that attempts to reveal the true nature of our surroundings, to lift the veil that normally obscures our senses. However, lifting this curtain likely does more harm than good since I hypothesize that sleep is an evolutionary trait developed to ensure that when we enter REM state – the state in which we would normally be able see truly, what lies around us, we are asleep, and thus spared what would presumably be debilitating effects. The dreams we experience are the side effects of this reality.We are so far removed from this reality however, that I speculate it will take multiple days of consistent wakefulness for the effects of REM to come into full swing.I do this in hopes of heralding a new era for mankind.Day 1Normal day, nothing out of the ordinary whatsoever occurred Ate, read books, played some games. Nothing to note.Day 2I have a doctorate degree. I’ve spent plenty of nights staying up finishing an assignment I had procrastinated. Nothing new, this day is also perfectly normal, though I noted a small decrease an appetite.Day 3A bit of fatigue starting to creep in. Lower appetite. Minor hallucinations. I often imagine something is moving at the edge of my vision, an insect or the like, but when I look to it, there is nothing there.Day 4Fatigue is definitely heavier now, though nothing I cannot handle. Insect hallucinations persist, and it seems as if the “insects” are larger. Still nothing when I look at them however. I had some friends, Jonah and Merin, drive me to a restaurant. We chatted and ate, and I felt normal, not sleep deprived at all. When they left however, the feeling came rushing back. Since I won’t be using drugs of any sort, including caffeine, to keep me awake, I’ll be relying increasingly on Jonah and Merin to make sure I follow through with the experiment without any sleep.Day 5This is now the longest I’ve ever stayed awake. The one time before was on a bet with a friend, however, I’m sure I must’ve taken micro-naps and such when I did. Heavier fatigue, and the insects are definitely larger now. I have no real idea of what they look like, they are just black at the edges of my vision. I’m vaguely aware of size and movement, but when I whip my head around there is nothing there. I called Merin and talked to her for a few hours multiple times to keep myself entertained and thus, awake.Day 6I have a bit of a headache, but other than that fatigue actually seems to have lessened a bit, strangely enough. The hallucinations were almost not there, almost. Jonah and Merin both commented that I seemed pretty much normal when previously I’d been a bit irate. Seems almost worrying. No matter, a day is a small sample size. Minor hormonal imbalances or just random moods may have caused me to feel more awake than normal.Day 7Again, I feel perfectly fine. I’m almost certain I have not been taking micro-naps, my custom-made bracelet would tell me if I were based on my pulse and breathing. I am beginning to seriously question my hypothesis now. I’d hoped for the “hallucinations,” to intensify, for my REM awake mind to perceive more deeply through the veil.Day 8The exhaustion has hit me much harder than day five. The hallucinations no longer haunt just my peripheral vision. I see insects, dark and somehow…blurry, crawling by my feet. Occasionally one will touch me, or at least I feel like one touches me. They are more detailed now. Not just generic insects but various kinds. Cockroaches, worms, spiders. I can only speculate now that Days 6 and 7 were the body’s last “reserves” so to say, driving off the sleep. These reserves, blessedly, seem to have expired; I can continue the experiment.Day 9Merin and Jonah have temporarily moved in to keep me awake. They switch off staying with me, making sure I don’t dose off. The hallucinations are growing more potent. Yesterday the TV suddenly faded to black, but something seemed…off. I frowned and moved closer to the TV with Jonah looking at me as if I was insane. When I was just inches away, I realized there wasn’t nothing there but everything. Millions of those insects were on the TV, crawling, trampling and eating one another. I screamed and tripped over the table trying to flinch away from the thing. Jonah swore that the TV had been playing normally the whole time.Day 10They are real. One of the insects bit my toe today. There was a sharp sensation of pain, like being poked by a needle, but it left a scar. I showed Jonah and Merin and they both could see it. They didn’t believe it was the insects of course, but I knew. I knew. I was right. I am right. These aren’t just hallucinations, these are real.Day 11I can hear them now. It is mostly just chitter chatter, though I can make out a select few words. “Come.” “Gate.” “Cross.” “Shroud.” That’s what they call it, their world. The Shroud. It is where they live, it is the other reality that is there, always there. It is the barrier which I have lowered for myself. Their meaning is clear. It is not enough yet, there is more to see, to experience. I must continue.Day 12Merin tried to talk me out of continuing the experiment today. She said I might suffer permanent damage. The insects, they whispered to me angrily as she did. I think I understand them more already. I was so close they said, so close. I flat out told Merin no. I wouldn’t back out after coming this far.Day 13The insects are everywhere. They cling lazily to the walls, the floor, to Merin and Jonah. And to me of course. I attract them like a magnet attracts metal shavings. Soon they promise. I can hardly contain myself.Day 16I’d almost forgot to update this log in time. Though to be honest I don’t really understand why I still do this. This doesn’t matter, if you’re reading you probably don’t matter. But there is a chance you read this, and you decide to do the same, to open your eyes. Perhaps that is reason enough. Perhaps. I can feel the veil weakening. I see more clearly already. They aren’t insects see, not really. But concepts, ideas. Black slimy worms emanate out of Merin and Jonah when they look at me. Worry. Sometimes there are black butterflies too – fear. I had Merin drive me around so I could just watch people. Blood-red bees around a fighting couple. Anger. Leeches next to a weeping couple standing near a small gravestone. Sorrow. Do they cause it or are they attracted to it? Irrelevant perhaps.Day 18Jonah and Merin have offered me an ultimatum. Day 20. Either I quit willingly, or they will stop trying to keep me awake. For my own good they say. Can’t they see this is good? I don’t think I can stay awake on my own despite it all. The human body seems to have evolved specifically to prevent such a thing from happening.Day 19It’s happened. It’s finally happened. One of the walls in my bedroom is no longer a wall. It is…a gateway. I suppose that’s the word for it. I can see it from my bedroom. I sat there, cross legged for hours just looking at it. The Shroud. It didn’t just have insects, it was insects. The trees were made of billions of them squirming, shifting against each other. Even the ground was a constantly moving orgy of insects. But what entranced me was It. The Creature. It stood as far away from it’s side of the portal as I was from my side. It was as tall as I was. It had two legs, four arms and a hexagonal face. It had no other features. And it was also constantly moving, shifting, writhing. It too was made of the insects. The portal beckoned. The Creature beckoned. But there was a price to pay of course. Such things are not free. I understood that now. I was a fool not have seen it before. I needed to attract the insects, more insects than I had ever even seen before. I needed to become of the Shroud.Day 20Lots of insects. They cover me. Anger. Worry. Sorrow. Fear. Worms, spiders, butterflies, leeches. They had covered the bodies before, the ones who would’ve taken it all from me. Who would’ve abandoned me at the precipice of greatness. They’d deserved it. But now the insects came to me, for it was my actions that had beckoned them. They were me and I was them, at least for a bit. I am going to step through, take down the final barrier separating our worlds. One small step for man…Day 23This is an automated message. Due to lack of activity for 72 hours, Var_Time_Out is set to true and this log has been automatically published https://ift.tt/eA8V8J https://ift.tt/2I7W3Uz
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