30 [M4F] SoCal/Anywhere, Not looking for my other half, but someone who can be an addition to my life.

This is my second time posting this. I did get a decent number of replies, but many have already disappeared. I did meet some really cool people so far and still do talk to them! I haven't felt a super strong connection yet, but things do take time. Also, please understand I do occasionally get very busy!

As the title states, I’m looking for someone who’s not completely dependent on relationships, but would like be in one. Someone who doesn’t feel like they need to have their significant other to be their only source of happiness.

I figured I’d make my own post since I’m tired of texting a bunch of things about myself only to not get a response or ghosted after not replying instantly. I can get VERY busy over the course of a week. I’m not a gifted writer like what seems to be 90% of the reddit population, but I’ll try my best. I highly prefer voice chat when I have the time. I’ve actually only voice chatted with a few people and they’re the only ones I still speak to out of the other 50 or so people I messaged/added. Sound waves are just so much better than pixels. I swear I’m so much different than from who I am when I text. Although, I do prefer voice chatting, there are times where I might be too busy for it.

How I look: I’ve been told I look really young for my age. I get guesses from 25 all the way down to 20. I hardly ever get guesses above 25. I’m willing to send a picture, but would like to receive one first. I don’t really want people to recognize me on here because it’s a bit embarrassing otherwise I’d just link it here ;). I’ve received ratings mostly between a 6-8. I consider myself a 6 hahaha. It might even be generous, who knows...but I wouldn't expect anything past that if I were you.

Sooo about me...I’m 5’10” and 155lbs. I’ve been single for over a year and have been in two long term relationships. Just like many other people on this subreddit I am into music. I really like melodic music, but I’m into pretty much anything. I do have a preference, but it changes so often. Indie, Jazz, mainstream EDM, shoe-gaze, lo-fi. I seriously have such a great range in taste for music. If I had to choose then it’d be indie /hipster stuff, haha. There’s just something amazing about listening to something that someone put their emotions and stories into that hasn’t hit it big yet. In a way it’s like art. There’s so many pieces out there that has yet to be seen by eyes just like in music there are so many songs that have yet to be heard by many human ears. You’d be one of the first few to listen to the artist’s story and creation.

I love Netflix/Hulu and movies. I’d probably watch more if it was with someone else (friend or significant other), but it’s usually not on my priority for hobbies. I’m open with shows just like I am with music. I like The Office, Brooklyn 99, Archer, Bojack Horseman, Stranger Things, Community, Travelers, Steven Universe, Violet Evergarden, Man in The High Castle and The Expanse. I know most of those are kind of generic, but they’re great shows. I also like documentaries. I love horror and Sci-fi movies. Interstellar and the Arrival are probably my favourite. For horror I’d have to go with the Conjuring series. I haven’t seen a single Marvel movie, but it’s not that I’m not interested...it’s just that there’s so many.

I do play video games, but it’s not my main hobby at the moment. I'd be down to play though if invited. I own a PC. I play league sometimes, but not seriously. I play Overwatch from time to time. I used to be into MMOs, but they take too much time and I don’t really have the time for that anymore. I also own a PS4, but I hardly touch it. My other hobbies would probably give away who I am if anyone I know is browsing this subreddit so I’ll just give the generic ones for now. I like going out on walks if there’s nice scenery. I love attending classical concerts. Live music sounds so much better! Especially Jazz and Classical. And just walking around late at night after a concert is an amazing and unique feeling. I like to find new places to eat, but I love cooking as well and I’m pretty good at it. Not chef level, but better than most. I try to have a healthy life style so I can keep looking young and thin. I love to travel, it’s my main motivation in life and is my driving force to continue the grind.

More things to add:

I’m in a very awkward situation in my life. I still go to college and have a part-time job. I feel like the main reason I’ve been single lately is because of my current state in life. People my age have careers and graduated with degrees. Some even married. So I don’t really attract anyone my age, because I seem too immature to them. If I do attract people my age, I feel as if I'm usually attracting the ones at the bottom of the barrel. Someone who's probably carrying a lot of baggage. However, when it comes to people who are still going to school, well I’m too old for them and it seems to turn a lot off. They either think I’m too mature to be hanging around them or too immature for wanting to be their friend. I’m also very picky when it comes to dating. Although, I really shouldn’t be picky.

I would like to take things slow. Very slow. Everything these days just seems so rushed. And it seems like if nothing happens in the first few weeks then people tend to just give up on romance. I’m not going to spit out my whole life story in the first five minutes. A strong relationship needs a strong foundation and if the foundation was built in a day then it’s not going to be stable. This is something I believe in. I feel like this is also one of the factors on why I’m still single...because I’m not jumping off the cliff with someone in the first week of meeting them. If someone who’s 30 can take his time then there’s no reason why anyone else can’t. Any guy/gal out there can give their 100% in the first month or so. Then later they turn out to be littered with issues and problems and then people wonder why things don’t work out or why they can’t find anyone. It could have all been avoided if people just take their time with these things. But then again what do I know? I am posting here, hahaha. Maybe I’m the one who’s wrong.

I feel as if I put more effort than most before I’m ghosted. I don't think it’s confirmation bias, either. I generally put more effort and time in my responses and in conversations, but people just seem to brush me off. Maybe I'm just too busy? Maybe I’m just that boring? But like I said before, I’m pretty bad at texting.

Pros:

• I’m 30, so I’m more collected and have things figured out. I’m not as neurotic as most people. More mellow. Less insecure.

• I’m not controlling. You can have guy friends lol. You can go out and have hobbies. I don’t get jealous easily. So, rejecting an invitation from me is not an issue, but I'd prefer to be rejected than ignored. I'm also still very much into monogamy though!

• I’m very open minded for most things and I’m not that stubborn. I’m not ignorant and I’m willing to learn.

• I have a lot of empathy and sometimes I feel like I have too much empathy. I’ve donated blood and hair before. So this means it’ll sound like I actually care about you instead of having hidden motives.

• I’m slightly ambitious. Hahaha. I meeeaannn I’m not sitting on the couch at home 24/7. I do want to go out and experience/learn new things. At this age, life starts to seem really short.

• I’m healthy so that means I like to eat healthy and do healthy things occasionally.

• I’m Asian if you're into that.

Cons:

• I’m Asian if you're not into that.

• I still go to college, but I’m working super hard on it. I promise!

• I don’t own a car. There’s enough vehicles out there killing the planet. Metro, train, bus and walking are my forms of transportation. Lyft share or eco uber occasionally. I’m also saving money with this current life style. It isn’t a permanent thing though. Once I’m done with school, I have no other choice but to get a car or something. Maybe a moped. Jk

• I’m not witty or hilarious. :( Seriously, everyone and their moms are looking for witty people. NOT EVERYONE IS GOING TO BE WITTY. I’m sorry, it’s just the truth. I know humour is a big thing for a lot of people, but there’s plenty of other things that’ll make us laugh. I hope.

What I’m looking for:

• Someone who isn’t extremely depressed or mentally ill. I’ve been in this situation before and it dragged me down a lot and this person ended up not sticking around anyway. So I’d like someone who doesn’t have depression controlling their life. It’s a common thing and that’s okay, but when it’s major depression then it becomes a problem for me.

• Someone who knows the difference between BBW and Obesity. Obesity is an issue just like alcoholism. I want someone who can match my healthy life style and there’s plenty of BBWs out there who are healthy. Obesity isn’t though and I think the sooner some people realize that then the better. It speaks a lot about someone’s behavior. Lack of motivation/willpower, lack of self love, and someone who probably shifts blame or responsibility. I know there’s some people with hormonal imbalance, but I doubt everyone is going through that or has something similar. Please no hate mail :(.

• Someone who is open-minded, doesn’t anger easily and isn’t stubborn. People are different and will have different opinions. It doesn’t make your own opinions wrong nor does it belittle them.

• Someone who wears glasses. This is more of a preference and not a requirement. It makes EVERYONE seem more attractive. I mean even guys look better in them. They’re just basically fashion accessories to me.

• Someone who's willing to voice chat at some point and get to know each other. Also, comfortable with silence.

• I’m not too keen on tattoos, but I can tolerate them.

• Weed is okay, but I don’t smoke. Anything past that is a definite no.

• Preferably someone who lives near by or in the same country. But I’m open to anything. The world’s a big place so relationships can be found anywhere.

• Someone who is older than 22 and younger than 34. I just feel like any younger and it’d be too big of a gap. Most people don’t know what they want before that age, they are also more likely to ghost and don’t really know how to hold a conversation. Might make an exception. Idk. Also, if older than 34 then I’d feel like there could be a chance where we wouldn’t be able to have kids if it ever gets to that point. Due to school and other goals I have for traveling. 30 is the new 20!

Thanks for taking the time to read this. I honestly don’t mind being alone, but I don't mind looking, either; but it’d be nice to have someone to chat with every once in a while.

If you read all the way to the end then please send me a message! It means I didn’t bore you to death and that’s a huge plus. I promise to not ghost you! Just don’t give me short five word replies.

This is my second time posting this. I did get a decent number of replies, but many have already disappeared. I did meet some really cool people so far and still do talk to them! I haven't felt a super strong connection yet, but things do take time. Also, please understand I do occasionally get very busy!As the title states, I’m looking for someone who’s not completely dependent on relationships, but would like be in one. Someone who doesn’t feel like they need to have their significant other to be their only source of happiness.I figured I’d make my own post since I’m tired of texting a bunch of things about myself only to not get a response or ghosted after not replying instantly. I can get VERY busy over the course of a week. I’m not a gifted writer like what seems to be 90% of the reddit population, but I’ll try my best. I highly prefer voice chat when I have the time. I’ve actually only voice chatted with a few people and they’re the only ones I still speak to out of the other 50 or so people I messaged/added. Sound waves are just so much better than pixels. I swear I’m so much different than from who I am when I text. Although, I do prefer voice chatting, there are times where I might be too busy for it.How I look: I’ve been told I look really young for my age. I get guesses from 25 all the way down to 20. I hardly ever get guesses above 25. I’m willing to send a picture, but would like to receive one first. I don’t really want people to recognize me on here because it’s a bit embarrassing otherwise I’d just link it here ;). I’ve received ratings mostly between a 6-8. I consider myself a 6 hahaha. It might even be generous, who knows...but I wouldn't expect anything past that if I were you.Sooo about me...I’m 5’10” and 155lbs. I’ve been single for over a year and have been in two long term relationships. Just like many other people on this subreddit I am into music. I really like melodic music, but I’m into pretty much anything. I do have a preference, but it changes so often. Indie, Jazz, mainstream EDM, shoe-gaze, lo-fi. I seriously have such a great range in taste for music. If I had to choose then it’d be indie /hipster stuff, haha. There’s just something amazing about listening to something that someone put their emotions and stories into that hasn’t hit it big yet. In a way it’s like art. There’s so many pieces out there that has yet to be seen by eyes just like in music there are so many songs that have yet to be heard by many human ears. You’d be one of the first few to listen to the artist’s story and creation.I love Netflix/Hulu and movies. I’d probably watch more if it was with someone else (friend or significant other), but it’s usually not on my priority for hobbies. I’m open with shows just like I am with music. I like The Office, Brooklyn 99, Archer, Bojack Horseman, Stranger Things, Community, Travelers, Steven Universe, Violet Evergarden, Man in The High Castle and The Expanse. I know most of those are kind of generic, but they’re great shows. I also like documentaries. I love horror and Sci-fi movies. Interstellar and the Arrival are probably my favourite. For horror I’d have to go with the Conjuring series. I haven’t seen a single Marvel movie, but it’s not that I’m not interested...it’s just that there’s so many.I do play video games, but it’s not my main hobby at the moment. I'd be down to play though if invited. I own a PC. I play league sometimes, but not seriously. I play Overwatch from time to time. I used to be into MMOs, but they take too much time and I don’t really have the time for that anymore. I also own a PS4, but I hardly touch it. My other hobbies would probably give away who I am if anyone I know is browsing this subreddit so I’ll just give the generic ones for now. I like going out on walks if there’s nice scenery. I love attending classical concerts. Live music sounds so much better! Especially Jazz and Classical. And just walking around late at night after a concert is an amazing and unique feeling. I like to find new places to eat, but I love cooking as well and I’m pretty good at it. Not chef level, but better than most. I try to have a healthy life style so I can keep looking young and thin. I love to travel, it’s my main motivation in life and is my driving force to continue the grind.More things to add:I’m in a very awkward situation in my life. I still go to college and have a part-time job. I feel like the main reason I’ve been single lately is because of my current state in life. People my age have careers and graduated with degrees. Some even married. So I don’t really attract anyone my age, because I seem too immature to them. If I do attract people my age, I feel as if I'm usually attracting the ones at the bottom of the barrel. Someone who's probably carrying a lot of baggage. However, when it comes to people who are still going to school, well I’m too old for them and it seems to turn a lot off. They either think I’m too mature to be hanging around them or too immature for wanting to be their friend. I’m also very picky when it comes to dating. Although, I really shouldn’t be picky.I would like to take things slow. Very slow. Everything these days just seems so rushed. And it seems like if nothing happens in the first few weeks then people tend to just give up on romance. I’m not going to spit out my whole life story in the first five minutes. A strong relationship needs a strong foundation and if the foundation was built in a day then it’s not going to be stable. This is something I believe in. I feel like this is also one of the factors on why I’m still single...because I’m not jumping off the cliff with someone in the first week of meeting them. If someone who’s 30 can take his time then there’s no reason why anyone else can’t. Any guy/gal out there can give their 100% in the first month or so. Then later they turn out to be littered with issues and problems and then people wonder why things don’t work out or why they can’t find anyone. It could have all been avoided if people just take their time with these things. But then again what do I know? I am posting here, hahaha. Maybe I’m the one who’s wrong.I feel as if I put more effort than most before I’m ghosted. I don't think it’s confirmation bias, either. I generally put more effort and time in my responses and in conversations, but people just seem to brush me off. Maybe I'm just too busy? Maybe I’m just that boring? But like I said before, I’m pretty bad at texting.Pros:I’m 30, so I’m more collected and have things figured out. I’m not as neurotic as most people. More mellow. Less insecure.I’m not controlling. You can have guy friends lol. You can go out and have hobbies. I don’t get jealous easily. So, rejecting an invitation from me is not an issue, but I'd prefer to be rejected than ignored. I'm also still very much into monogamy though!I’m very open minded for most things and I’m not that stubborn. I’m not ignorant and I’m willing to learn.I have a lot of empathy and sometimes I feel like I have too much empathy. I’ve donated blood and hair before. So this means it’ll sound like I actually care about you instead of having hidden motives.I’m slightly ambitious. Hahaha. I meeeaannn I’m not sitting on the couch at home 24/7. I do want to go out and experience/learn new things. At this age, life starts to seem really short.I’m healthy so that means I like to eat healthy and do healthy things occasionally.I’m Asian if you're into that.Cons:I’m Asian if you're not into that.I still go to college, but I’m working super hard on it. I promise!I don’t own a car. There’s enough vehicles out there killing the planet. Metro, train, bus and walking are my forms of transportation. Lyft share or eco uber occasionally. I’m also saving money with this current life style. It isn’t a permanent thing though. Once I’m done with school, I have no other choice but to get a car or something. Maybe a moped. JkI’m not witty or hilarious. :( Seriously, everyone and their moms are looking for witty people. NOT EVERYONE IS GOING TO BE WITTY. I’m sorry, it’s just the truth. I know humour is a big thing for a lot of people, but there’s plenty of other things that’ll make us laugh. I hope.What I’m looking for:Someone who isn’t extremely depressed or mentally ill. I’ve been in this situation before and it dragged me down a lot and this person ended up not sticking around anyway. So I’d like someone who doesn’t have depression controlling their life. It’s a common thing and that’s okay, but when it’s major depression then it becomes a problem for me.Someone who knows the difference between BBW and Obesity. Obesity is an issue just like alcoholism. I want someone who can match my healthy life style and there’s plenty of BBWs out there who are healthy. Obesity isn’t though and I think the sooner some people realize that then the better. It speaks a lot about someone’s behavior. Lack of motivation/willpower, lack of self love, and someone who probably shifts blame or responsibility. I know there’s some people with hormonal imbalance, but I doubt everyone is going through that or has something similar. Please no hate mail :(.Someone who is open-minded, doesn’t anger easily and isn’t stubborn. People are different and will have different opinions. It doesn’t make your own opinions wrong nor does it belittle them.Someone who wears glasses. This is more of a preference and not a requirement. It makes EVERYONE seem more attractive. I mean even guys look better in them. They’re just basically fashion accessories to me.Someone who's willing to voice chat at some point and get to know each other. Also, comfortable with silence.I’m not too keen on tattoos, but I can tolerate them.Weed is okay, but I don’t smoke. Anything past that is a definite no.Preferably someone who lives near by or in the same country. But I’m open to anything. The world’s a big place so relationships can be found anywhere.Someone who is older than 22 and younger than 34. I just feel like any younger and it’d be too big of a gap. Most people don’t know what they want before that age, they are also more likely to ghost and don’t really know how to hold a conversation. Might make an exception. Idk. Also, if older than 34 then I’d feel like there could be a chance where we wouldn’t be able to have kids if it ever gets to that point. Due to school and other goals I have for traveling. 30 is the new 20!Thanks for taking the time to read this. I honestly don’t mind being alone, but I don't mind looking, either; but it’d be nice to have someone to chat with every once in a while.If you read all the way to the end then please send me a message! It means I didn’t bore you to death and that’s a huge plus. I promise to not ghost you! Just don’t give me short five word replies. https://ift.tt/eA8V8J https://ift.tt/2EJHx8q