My marriage partner (afab) of 5 years has come out as male.
It has been a process and I'm so happy for him and his transition. I love him deeply and i melt when i see him so happy.
The problem is with the binder and packing and new haircut. I just don't feel sexually attracted to him at all.
I find myself avoiding sexual situations not only because if i accidently touch his "breasts", it will trigger a disphoric episode where we end up both crying but also because I'm just not attracted to him at all.
I can fake it but he is dreaming about top surgery and I just get so sad at the prospect of a sexless marriage or one where i just go through the motions forever or the alternative that I break his heart.
I'm afraid he would stop transitioning to save our relationship, and at the same time I dunno if our relationship can survive it anyway.
Also I feel horrible and shallow for even thinking these thoughts. I told myself that if he wasn't trans and had breast cancer or a hormone imbalance i wouldn't leave so why is this any different?
Our relationship is very strong in other ways and we are each others best friends, I don't want to spend my life with anyone else.
I guess I just needed to vent. Thanks for reading.
My marriage partner (afab) of 5 years has come out as male.It has been a process and I'm so happy for him and his transition. I love him deeply and i melt when i see him so happy.The problem is with the binder and packing and new haircut. I just don't feel sexually attracted to him at all.I find myself avoiding sexual situations not only because if i accidently touch his "breasts", it will trigger a disphoric episode where we end up both crying but also because I'm just not attracted to him at all.I can fake it but he is dreaming about top surgery and I just get so sad at the prospect of a sexless marriage or one where i just go through the motions forever or the alternative that I break his heart.I'm afraid he would stop transitioning to save our relationship, and at the same time I dunno if our relationship can survive it anyway.Also I feel horrible and shallow for even thinking these thoughts. I told myself that if he wasn't trans and had breast cancer or a hormone imbalance i wouldn't leave so why is this any different?Our relationship is very strong in other ways and we are each others best friends, I don't want to spend my life with anyone else.I guess I just needed to vent. Thanks for reading. https://ift.tt/eA8V8J https://ift.tt/3xt7ctD
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